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Welcome Home: Traveling Back to the Motherland for the First Time

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By Dr. Jerald L. Adamos (jladamos@stanford.edu)

I write to you to share my experience as a 2nd-Generation, Pilipinx American who had the opportunity to travel back to the motherland for the first time. Before I share that, I wanted to share some context as to why it has taken so long for me to make this trip.

I grew up in a military family and we settled in a predominantly low-to-lower middle-income community once my dad retired from his service. My family didn’t have the means to travel often as we had to prioritize our needs over our desires. We spoke mostly English in our house and I wasn’t taught my native language growing up as it was actually used to keep us from certain conversations they didn’t want us know about. I believe my parents did the best to support our family and I’ve become more aware of the sacrifices they made in choosing not to return back to the home country for any reason until recent.

As I grew older, I went through my own identity development - from first trying to ascribe to western notions of beauty and self-hating what I looked like because I wasn’t light-skinned or White like the people I saw on TV and the movies, to fully accepting my features and developing a sense pride of my people and the contributions of our community. I was fortunate in my later years with opportunities to learn about the experiences of Asians in America and this sparked my desire to finally “come back home”.

After receiving my doctorate in 2019, I felt that this would be the perfect time to make this trip happen with my parents. They left the Philippines in pursuit of their American dream and like many immigrant families, this meant having one of their kids become a doctor. Though not the kind of doctor they expected, I felt that I helped them achieve their dream and wanted to go back to the motherland with them and celebrate as a way to come full circle on what they originally set out to accomplish.

The world pandemic unfortunately put a pause on that plan as traveling became too risky. 4 years later, my parents shared their desire to move back to the Philippines and build a new home on our ancestral land. With travel restrictions being lifted, this felt like the right time for my homecoming.

I was both nervous and excited, especially since I was told that I may stand out as someone who was raised in America. While I did experience feeling like an “outsider" in some major cities like Manila and Olongapo, the majority of my experience was very welcoming. My parents are from the Zambales province and most people wanted to know who I was and what brought me back, they seemed genuinely excited to want to get to know me. One night, we had a town fiesta focused on Balikbayans (a term used for a Filipinos who are visiting or returning to the Philippines after living in another country after a period of time) and to my surprise, I was included and showered with a lot of love from the community and personal “welcome home” message. I became so emotional and fell so much more in love with my culture as it helped bring a calmness in my core that I never realized I needed.

Throughout my trip, I got to spend more time in my community - meeting family members for the first time, talking with long-time family friends who shared stories of how my parents were when they were younger, eating native fruits like atis, chico, and lanzones, and being surrounded by my native language which I tried picking up.  

In addition, I had the opportunity to travel around the country for a little.  Being Ilocano, my family wanted me to see the land of my people and showed me around through Pangasinan, La Union, and Ilocos Sur.  My experience instilled a sense of pride of where I came from and showed me the great diversity of our people and land. I also had the opportunity travel on my own and spent time at a surf camp in Siargao, where I spent every day in the beautiful water.

Although it took me a long time to go back to the Philippines, I’m glad that I was able to go in this phase of my life where I was able to appreciate our culture with a level of maturity. I was able to question deeply to better understand our culture - why things are the way they are, why people think a certain way, what things people are willing to fight for and accept, amongst other notions I was interested in. I was able to savor the grand experiences of visiting the different regions of the country but also appreciate the moments of connection with people and our community. I was exposed to the humble beginnings of my family and learned to appreciate the sacrifices they made in moving to a new country, navigating an unfamiliar system and language - all for the sake of a better life for my siblings and me.

Now that I’m back, I hope others can experience a homecoming trip like I did.  I’ve realized that many of my travels have been prompted with a need to escape, but this became a trip that allowed me to connect - to my family, my culture, my land, and my soul.  If you haven’t been to your home country or you’ve been many times, I encourage you to take time to find a connection and build meaning to your experience. In the meantime, I have just a few tips if you’re planning an upcoming trip to the Philippines that I learned along the way:

  • Most things are “back to normal” but the pandemic did affect airplane travel. If you plan to travel to other parts of the country by plane, know that you’ll most likely need to do a layover in Manila as direct flights between cities/islands are much more limited.
  • You must register your health declaration before arriving to the Philippines. You can get your eTravel QR code 3 days before you arrive online and you’ll be asked to present it upon your arrival at any airport.
  • Plan to arrive 2-3 hours before your flight at any airport. Check-in lines can be very long and be sure to know your luggage allowance in advance. My backpack was considered too big to be a carry-in so I had to check it in and pay a fee.
  • Bring mosquito repellent and sunscreen! It can be hot when you travel and mosquitos are everywhere and will get you!
  • While ATMS are available to pull local currency, you might get a better exchange rate by bringing American cash. Just be mindful that you’ll need bills without any tears or markings on them, otherwise they may not be accepted.
  • Pack lightly and expect to bring more things back. I am a planner and wasn’t sure what I needed for this trip and it turned out that I didn’t use more than half of the clothes/items I brought as I ended up buying things locally. Your dollar will go a long way out there and you can buy almost anything you might need.
  • Depending on your phone plan, cell service may work but it will be much slower and/or really limited. You may want to check with your phone company on charges and usability prior to your travels.
  • Their rideshare app is “Grab” which is similar to Uber and Lyft. Be mindful that they don’t go everywhere as I sometimes needed to travel to the closest major city to grab one to get around. You might also want to try a tricycle or jeepney as well to save a bit.  
  • For my fellow vegans - you can survive! The Philippines has a lot of fresh vegetables and fruits that you should definitely take advantage of.  There is also a vegan movement starting up across the country so you may be able to find a few restaurants that are fully vegan. Be mindful that some places may offer vegetable-forward dishes but it may still contain meat, so if in doubt, ask what’s included and decide for yourself.
  • In the major cities, English is spoken widely, however traveling through the provinces, language became more of a barrier. They will say they’re “getting a nosebleed” from trying to talk to you since they have to try to speak English so if you’re able to pick up a few basic phrases in Tagalog, that may serve you well.
  • It is much easier adjusting to the time when going to the Philippines but when you come back, you will definitely feel the jet lag. I’m told for every hour you travel back, it will take that many days to readjust to your current time zone, so try your best to not rush back into things so quickly.
  • If you bring back a balikbayan box, it may be checked randomly. Be mindful that you cannot bring back any meat items, fruits, veggies, or any type of fish (dried, cooked, or raw). You may be fined if they are found. Also know that certain airlines may have a size limit for your box, if it is “oversized”, you may be charged an additional fee.
  • You will see a range income levels. It’s normal to feel guilty at times but it’s not ok to treat others as if you’re better.  Feel free to give whenever and wherever you can and know that a smile goes a long way.
  • A small bag will be helpful to have on hand.  Pick-pocketing is unfortunately an issue in various places so keep your items close to you.
  • Tipping is very much appreciated.  Even if it’s a few pesos, every little thing helps.

I hope my experience encourages you to visit your homeland and find meaning in your next trip. Thanks taking the time to read my story with openness and kindness.